Lodoss : the accursed island. Born of fire, baptized in flame; the land of Lodoss has existed for thousands of years governed by laws. Be they unspoken laws of man, laws of nature, or laws of anime...
| Law #1 : Cool armor = superior fighting ability |
In the Lodoss hierarchy it is easy to tell who can fight. Parn for instance has armor, but he cannot fight well. This is given the fact that his armor is rather plain. Later, when he can fight better he attains a cool cape to billow dramatically. Ashrum on the other hand has very ornate armor, which coincides with the fact that he kicks ass. Sentries who don't wear armor and wear drab clothing are almost guaranteed to be killed.
| Law #2 : People die, horses do not |
Primary example during the princesses capture. One of her body guards gets killed by a ball of fire. Result : Guard dies of burns, horse stands around looking clueless.
| Law #3 : Powerful mages never look like they are exerting themselves |
If you are very powerful and evil, you must never look like your exerting yourself. It is imperative that if you are a powerful sorcerer, that you never LOOK like your trying, no matter how hard you really ARE trying. This is neccesary for making evil look cool. The good guys look like they are trying, while the evil guys look like they are bored. "So you see, evil will always triumph, because good is dumb."
| Law #4 : The amount of cleavage is directly proportional to how evil that character is |
Yes... good little elf girls dress conservatively, but naughty little elf girls wear sexy stuff like short tight mini skirts.
| Law #5 : Spontaneous combustion of structures under siege |
During battle things may catch on fire. In fact they ALWAYS catch on fire, even when no one carries a torch or any fire starting materials. The fire will then continue to burn regardless of whether the fuel is exhausted or not. Burning will cease in a few minutes after the battle is finished or by the next scene.
| Law #6 : Capes, banners etc. must always billow dramatically |
This rule does not apply if the moment dictates otherwise. If the mood is softer, things hang in their usual fashion. Otherwise they must blow in the wind for effect (even if this means that the banner/cape must generate it's own wind to do so. )
| Law #7 : The battle time out rule |
During battle, if two people (on the same side ) are engaged in a dramatic conversation (or dramatic pause ), the attacking force must then wait until the exchange is finished before continuing fighting. This allows for a more climactic effect.
| Law #8 : The witch presentation code |
Witches must always present themselves in a mysterious manner. Of course every rule has it's exceptions, and things are pretty lax when you sit around with your evil friends (in which case, just mysteriously appearing will do). But if you appear to someone who is common or good, the following system should be followed
© 1998 archen@scythe.net