Zoicite

Interview time once again. My last interview concluded with a shocking experience. Luckily I have gained a tolerance for electrocution though the years by modifying stereo equipment. As for my brain getting fried; you can't fry what you don't have. This interview will be with the general of the Negaverse: Zoicite. My next interview will be with the Doom Tree . It should be interesting. To avoid confusion I will be identified by D while Zoicite will be identified with Z . Well on with the interview.

D: Hmm... another late person geeze! Z: (Zoicite then appears and floats around) Ahh, keep your pants on. I showed up didn't I? D: Yeah, like way late! Z: Hey, I'm busy. (Zoicite then floats around interviewers head) D: Hey, cut it out! Z: Problem? D: Stop floating around me like that, your annoying me. Z: No. D: Look, could you at least float in front of me? Z: (Zoicite floats past interviewer, her boot "accidently" hitting interviewer in the head) (with sarcasm) Oh! I'm sorry. D: Let's get started. I heard that you and Sailor Mercury dated back in the Silver Millennium days. Of course now your going out with Malachite. What happened?

Z: Let me put it this way: dating Mercury is enough to make anybody jump to the other side of the fence, if you know what I mean.

D: Many people would like to know if you are a man or a woman. You were a man in Japan but dubbed as a woman in the U.S. Z: Man...Woman...it all pays the same in the Negaverse. D: How is the pay in the Negaverse? Z: It sucks, but no one buys anything anyway. Since we're all evil, everyone just steals everything. So we don't need that pesky money. Of course our economy in the Negaverse is pretty screwed up too. D: So is Queen Berril still working on the Negaverse line of commercial products? Z: Yeah, although after your interview, sales went down by 30%. The Negastock market almost crashed. But we have a new product that should break the slump. D: What is it? Z: NegaCola! available in diet and Negaclassic. Take a look. (tosses can) D: Hmmm.... lets see what's in it: vanilla extract, phosgene, caffeine, vitamin X, moth balls...etc. Z: We think it'll be a big seller! (in coaxing voice) We could sponsor your page if you like. D: Really? Z: Sure. Just put this picture above all of those web rings. D: (looks at picture) Hey wait! That's... Z: Yeah, some girl with a funny looking mark on her forehead. We needed someone to endorse our product, but when we called we got the wrong number and we got her instead. D: You actually got her to endorse this? Z: No, we're using the picture without permission, but we're the Negaverse; it's our job to violate copyrights and rip people off. Why don't you try it? D: (nervously looks at can) Er...I don't know... Z: (Threateningly) I insist D: Well, it's got lots of caffeine so it can't be too bad. (takes drink) Z: What do you think? D: (pauses) Tastes like chicken. Z: Does that mean you like it? D: I don't know. I've never had a soda that tastes like chicken before. Z: That's probably because many of the ingredients come from Nephlites shampoo. [see interview with Berril]. D: (spits out soda) What?!!! Z: Yeah, Nephlites shampoo. D: (interviewer starts turning green) I'm gonna be sick. Z: Your such a wimp, just like Tuxedo Mask. D: (Fighting nausea) I heard you don't like him. Z: Yeah, but we have a little plan to take care of Tuxedo Mask. D: Oh? How does that work? Z: One thing that we know for a fact is that he's got his own theme music. So we're going to manipulate timespace so that his theme music plays before he arrives and interferes. (Smiles) And then we beat the tar out of him! D: What exactly do you plan on doing to him? Z: First we're going to take his baton and stick it... D: Hey, now! Keep it clean here. Z: I can say what I want you little weakling. (menacingly) Or are you going to stop me? D: (stands up and backs away) Stay back or else! Z: Or else what? D: I'll use this ! (pulls object out of coat pocket) Z: And just what is that supposed to be? D: (surprised) Um, oh.... Why it's a jelly filled doughnut. Z: You're going to defend yourself with that? D: Beware! For even a jelly filled doughnut can become an instrument of death in the hands of Archen! Nya, ha, ha! [cough, cough] Z: What is a wuss like you going to do with a jelly filled doughnut? D: (pauses in thought) Well..first I though I'd bean you in the head with it, then I was going to make fun of how you dress. Z: So you want to mess with Zoicite eh? [rose flies in middle of room] Z & D in unison: Tuxedo Mask! D: (nervously) Oh! Hi Tux. How's it going? TX: So I finally found you Zoicite, and talking to this scumbag Archen no less! D: Hey, take that back! Z: (sarcastically) ooh! You're scaring me Cape Boy

TX: Get real, you couldn't even take out this wimp Archen if you tried (interviewer not pleased with insults) Z: You want a piece of me Cape boy? Zoi!

D: (Zoicite and Tuxedo Mask fly out window to do battle) Yeah! Get'em Zoicite! Hey, wait no! Get away from my car! Oh, no!

Next time I will be interviewing the Doom Tree see you there.